'promises u made, coming back to haunt you....'

at the underground bullshit

NS*nix*DOPE

GANGSTAHZ

ME.lol who said i was on blogspot to look pretty, do i get props or what for my outfit.....flava flave,stevie wonder, gangstress gone wrong.lol

shameless, but i hope i made u smile....

*right for sum reason i wasnt able to upload vid, i left it uploading all daym night.......i think its too big, any1 know how i can make it a smaller file?*

and the vid we decided to take with our newly found personas!

have i got integrity or what?

a whole loada stuffz

wasss going on blog world! im at the office this morning, how crap is that, i thought i'd blog, but i dnt really wanna bore you with what went dwn cos we all know its just the usual chit chat eerrrrbody b talking about, and we listen politely.....

anyhoe.....

i got some vidz to post, they are too funny, saturday me and 2 of my girls were watching hip hop honours on mtv....and yes we started getting in the mood for some gansgter shit rapping, believe we turned my room around looking for clothing and accesories to look the part.....

will put up our one wen i get home. but to keep u entertained...check out our inspiration above.lol

we looked so gangster we HAD to do a hip hop vid, except we sorta lost the plot once recording!

*i will post vids later. promise!

hahahaha some funny shit still!

same day....later on in the night at about 1am my girl dope.......was forced to come to my yard so we can hit some local place....

*and it wasn't until a number of phonecalls and researching did we find this local venue* lol.....dope can comment on that 1!

anyway so we reach and we look around...shit this is some underground shit......

and remebering we reached somewaht after 1am! SCAREY i'd say! part of my ends r like overely ghetto! west london or not!

still its a tenner to get in.....i aint a cheapo....well i am, but i mean its a tenner to get into traffic *sum club in holborn* and that place is live!!!!

o my when we walked in, me and NS *my other girl* turned str8 to dope and gave her the look, ima kill u in a min!

this place was more than underground......yoyos in Notting hill was underground!!

the whole night we stayed in the corner drinking our cosmos, and shacking it out cos i must admit the music was LIIIIIIIVVVVVEEEEE!

*i'll insert a pic here*

i also bumped into a friend at the end of the night, who i see everywhere! i think he kinda cute.

lol me and my girls were outside, and i wass like thats my cousin...and i walk over to him.lol....dope and NS r watching me converse........and i know there both thinking, her cousin??? im sure i c a black man she's talking to.lol....hahahahaha will explain how i know him.....adrian *my black cousin*

HAHA

=D

on a last note, my brother....if you've been reading my blog, is GOOD and WELL!

PRAISE THE LORD!

*also thank you to u guys who prayed with me in spirit!*

well enough to go back home to the islands!! which he will do today, his flight is at 2pm....im gona miss him sooooo much, but im gonna c him again in 2/3 weeks cos im off there soooooooooon! cnt w8, massive family affair out there!! as in the WHOLE clang!!!!

dope u still coming bitch?

c ya

x

the sweetest name in the books *JESUS*

my bad not only the books, sweetest name full stop.
this morning i read my word for you today hit the link up on DGIMA its on one of her post, and while your there stay for a while...educate urself =D
anyhow i was on the UCB website and i clicked on a link under *why Jesus?*
i read it and i mean i've been a Born Again Christian for around 8yrs now, but reading that link, a few simple words made me fall so deeply in love again for the 1millionth time!

to whoever is reading this right now, i have no idea how your seeing this post, whether you are judging me because of my previous posts(antics) but not excusing myself but no one who has walked this earth is perfect apart from Jesus! Only by Gods grace and mercy do i wake up every morning knowing that im so loved, regardless of my wordly actions.

you know i've tried so hard to bring people to Jesus, family, friends and yes sometimes strangers hehe. But i dont get very far simply because how could i lead anyone to a destination that i have not reached?

dnt get it twisted though, i am 'highly capable' said my bestfriend the other night *thank you, i love u*

leaving that at that, i would like for you guys to read these lyrics or search the song on utube, cos i dnt know how to link a song/vid..eeeek! *furthermore get the album - the fight of my life*

The Last Jesus :
I see you, I need you, but I don't know your name
I touch you, say I love you, but that's all you get for today
It's easy, so easy, to tell you it's gon be okay
When I don't walk in ur shoes, haven't been through what you been through
Instead I push you away
Sunday everyone looks like you
But if our lives are cold inside tell me what's the use

If I say I love Jesus, but you can't see my Jesus
My words are empty, if they can't see Jesus in me
No more excuses, I give myself away
Because I may be the only Jesus they see

Too busy, forgive me, I've got problems of my own
It's easier to say your help is on the way
But I was your help all along
We're shouting, we're dancing, but can the world see a change
Am I just too selfish to see, the love they need You put inside of me

If we say we love Jesus, but they can't see our Jesus
Tell me what's the use if they can't see Jesus in you and me
No more excuses, we give it all away
Because we may be the only Jesus they see

If I am Your hands and Your feet, and if Your church is built inside of me
Where did we go wrong, we been here too long, we can't see Your face anymore
It's not the same anymore

Have mercy on us Jesus, please forgive us Jesus
I lost my purpose, if they can't see You in me
See I lied too long, and I change it all today
Because I may be, because I may be
The only Jesus they see, the only Jesus they see, the only Jesus they see

super blessed this morning, and the Holy Spirit wanted me to share my blessing with YOU!

Peace!

all 2gether now...'Nikki LOVEZ heelz!'

*add*

*ict*

*ion*

hahaha u know what im at home now, after a long day, and what better thing to do than to go through my heels and walk around feeling sexy.lol.....than i had a brilliant idea, y dnt we take some piccies and post them.......wasn't really feeling to put 'em all on and take a pic individually, but yeh.....

im bored now. lol. and im really annoyed cause im missing a few more heels.......and i just dont know where to find them, they can be in so many places.lol....(my girls' houses)

anyhow, im always on sites where i find a perfect looking pair of shoes, i stare hard, and want them so bad, i imagine how it would look with my diff outfits and how they'd make me feel, and how the girls would 'ooooh' and 'aaaahhhh' occasionally the boys too.lol....

then i think long enough *1 sec* imma buy these babies.....just to b so frickin dissappointed.....Y??

not cause they dont have my size

the price

or the colour

but to see that im on U.S

site and they dnt ship to where i bloody live.

frustrating huh!

after i've just about fallen in love with them.

and i would post the shoe.....well shoes that i cnt have,

but im not feeling to cry right about now.

HAHAHAHAHA!

i'd say......

ermmmmm....

it may b....

an

ADDICTION.

definately.

catch ya later

p.s a bit pointless i know.

as promised <>

so as i promised frm my previous post, the story about mummies birthday present.
so dec 6, im at home frm about 10 am....a little hungover and since no1 was in i sleep till about 3pm.
walk around the house and no1 is home, and im like...yeh im going out later but really, is it right ive spent half of my birthday on my own....sleeping.
i call mummy....

nix:ma where r u
ma:shopping y?
nix:what time will u b home, u know its my birthday...
ma:soon, we're just picking up the tree.

im kool with this cos i know theres no tree and i know shes out buying me something spectacular, u c kidz, my mum is different....no 'thanks alot' kinda presents frm her, its always a 'wow' i bloody wanted this but didnt even think of it to avoid disappointment!
any how they get home.....and get this her and her bf are dragging a tree.....daym she wernt lying....so i go to my room cos im so lazy and its my birthday and i didnt wanna fix that shit up.

then mum screams nix come here u got some pressies.....
i come out 2 the living room like an excied child and i c 3 boxes wrapped up. in front of mum, mums bf, my bro, and my lil cuz i open the first 1 ive been told to, its from my cousin and she got me some cup, cute cup that when u put water in the nose goes red...she was more excited then i was.lol
anyhow i go for the smaller box now, and mum interupts and says open the big box first, so im like ok, i open it and its pjs.....*drop dead grumpy...gorgeous crossed out.lol*
kool, im happy cos theres still that lil jewerelly shaped box. hehe by now got the fattest smile on my face......and all eyes are on me with this big grin right, so i open it, its in a leather box......black leather box, no signiture colours or labels, so already my ear to ear smile goes frm nostral to nostral.lol....(i think thats how u spell it)
still smiling, but with bait disappointment.
i open it, looking down at the most unexciting jade bracelet charm thingy.....im red i can feel it......my smile has GONE! and i can still feel all eyes on me, i look up and so happened to b my mums bf i c 1st, click.....he got a snap shot. i look at mum, 'thanks ma' she looks upset and im shitting myself i duno how to looks more happy........and i know these ppl are thinking what a spoilt ungrateful bitch! my bro comes up to me and nudges me put it on. its nice. mum asks me dont u like it.
im fricking speechless.guys it was SO SO SO SO BAD!
anyway about 5mins of speechlessness....we all start decorating. i keep throwing comments at mum about how its nice, but does it fit right etc....tryna justify my puzzled face when opened init.*nix man its a bracelet not a pair of jeans*

anyway mum wants to c wot im wearing tonight so shes asks me to do an outfit change....
so i got to my room, clutching my friggin gifts, and on my bed i c 1 hench box wrapped up. im like, fuck, no way......i pick it up and go to the living room. and sit dwn, and say guys......with a curious cheeky smile.
its big...and its heavy, and im like wtf can this b, i really cnt live no more if its 1 of those horrific incidents half hour ago. but i look at mum and she says open it.....so i open it, and its a laptop. =D
IVE WANTED ONE FOR AGES. AND THEY GOT ME 1!
do u know how bad i felt. i kept saying i dnt deserve this, not bcos i thought i was a bad daughter, but bcos of my spoilt bratness.

lol. i need to learn how to not expect so much huh.......

turned out alryt in the end tho......

daym losers always gotta play tricks!

anyway i need me some kipp,

nitey kidz

Super Lazy

hmmmm, so what have you missed???? u know what, ive just been so demotivated to get on a pc and blog, seriously, life is just dragging for me right now.

my daily routine

1. wake up at 6/7 am (depending on shift)
2. get ready
3. outta the house by 7/8am (depending again on shift)
4. get to work
5. work
6. finish at 5/6pm (depending on shift)
7. go home....get home
8. jam for a bit....(meaning stay in work clothes, mac and all...) *not trampish.just friggin tired*
9. eat
10. cook 4 fam(mum,her bf, bro) *y me, the youngest...so not my responsibilty*
11. sleep

okay doesn't sound to bad, but EVERY FUCKING DAY!

argh, im so relocating soon.

apart frm that, it was my birthday weekend just past, wohoooo 21 now but i feel like im 31!

fri night went to some club called Embassy with the girls, had a good night, never been there b4, the crowd was DEFF-RENTTT!!

poshies all over the place, and i think im saying this on behalf of all my girlies, we were certainly a breath of fresh air in there.

sat night we hit our usual spot, arch angel which was banging as usual....music good! atmosphere good! company good! it just felt good to be able to spend my night somewhere im familiar with!

will def get some fotos up, when i get them.

o yeh and i got some really really nice pressies!!!

mummy got me a........let that b my nx post actually.hehe

ugg boots,luella bag,laptop,jade bracelet,pjs,heater(trust me we need it in my room),MAC eyelash curler,perfume,swarovski earrings....

dnt think there was anything else but my bad if there was, and honestly wasn't expecting anything, cos im old mayn.=D

passing my birthday now, argh......im upset, i really am.

so you guys all know yankee if you've been reading my blog, well something i didnt even get to tell you guys was that yeh i broke up with him by txt, about summer 08, and like i really didnt hear frm him, yeh i was frikin heartless but i mean at least try...so much for 'cant say i didnt try'

argh wotever, anyway in the first post i wrote about him.....it started with me listening to my vmail on the fone i lost right?? well yeh he called and he left a msg, and i got in contact with him again. frm then lets say frm about oct 08 we'd been exchanging calls, you know finding out and just generally catching up. we finally met again....mid nov!!! when i say this guy still looked at me like i was shitting gold!!!! anyway so i stayed round, we spoke, we chilled, and frm what we discussed that night and previously he wasn't seeing anyone, but he was all good with his babymother. kool, you know so what went dwn went dwn....thinking about it now......daym, but lets NOT!

anyway last time i saw him was my birthday, fri night, and like yeh, it was my birthday!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY NIX! more like happy birthday YANKEE! anyway next morning i just felt wrong, so wrong and as usual i grabbed all my stuff......which was ALL over the place, anyway made sure not to leave anything. 3 days kater he calls me

yankee:hey baby, you know you got me in trouble

nix:huh how? *puzzled* but thinking maybe his backs broke*

yankee:yeh my babymother found your gold cardigan you were wearing the other day

nix thinking*excuse me?? y she at ur place going through ur shit, and more importantly y is she tripping?? (duno british term of tripping.lol.daym im so begging.lol)

nix:yanx that gold cardigan aint mine, i dont own a gold cardigan...

yankee starts shooting me with alibi's by now cos the way i dropped that line he knew he messed up, not only messed up but got caught!

i locked him off!

wank-ah.......fuckin wank-ah!

but im upset, at least i know now huh. =(

i spilled my guts out to u guys....i feel a lil better now.

so off to where now? i was thingking Australia or Canada.

p.s and not bcos of the last bit i wrote about.....more cos of the begining of the post.but yankees stunt was the last straw.