just a memory

'i was 9 and he was 12.

both being called into the living-room by an

angered.frustrated.alarming.high on weed.frightening.

voice.

i knew i should've shut my mouth.

i did it all the time.

he'd wind me up.

and i would scream the house dwn.

pops:(shouts@me) WHY ARE YOU SCREAMING?

*i know the drill, know whats gonna happen.v.hesitant to answer*

pops:(shouts louder) WHY ARE YOU SCREAMING?

*i jumped at his beaming noise.it not a voice anymore....*

nix:(sobbing)kuya hit me.

*it didn't hurt most of the time, but i was a brat.

he annoyed me.*

pops:ARE YOU HURT?

*i could've told the truth,but i never did......*

nix:yeh

(looking up @ my kuya, knowing he knew i was lying about being hurt, feeling guilty as shit, but cnt take back what i've done)

*BANG*

i watch kuyas head as it is flung back

hits the wall we were standing by

my kuya (brother) was always a soldier, even when my pops' timberland boot knocked his head on the wall

im crying next to him, feeling it for him, and he lays a hand on my shoulder tears in his eyes and apologizes to me....

this sort of thing happened on more than one occasions, my brother would take it all for me.

thats why i love his ass

whether its wrong or right

i'll take it all for him

this post is a very emotional post

i dnt even know why i've written it

but needless to say

we are

ride or die